《題破山寺後禪院》英譯六種

近授影視聲音創作,無意提及常建《題破山寺後禪院》意境轉化與聲音創作問題。問及諸生,皆以「有我之境」轉換此詩意境,深違向之所識。一週蒐集資料,似「有我之境」爲主流解讀,「有我」、「無我」非關乎對錯,關乎題旨也。「無我之境」固需多方資料佐證,本文所錄亦爲「轉換」之作,大多「轉換」爲「有我之境」。

Original Text by Chang Jian

題破山寺後禪院

  • 清晨入古寺,初日照高林。
  • 竹徑通幽處,禪房花木深。
  • 山光悅鳥性,潭影空人心。
  • 萬籟此俱寂,惟餘鐘磬音。

頷聯有作「曲徑」,有作「竹徑」,於詩意理解影響不大;尾聯有作「惟餘」,有作「惟聞」,於詩意理解至關重要。

Translation by Lu Pei-Xian

In the Rear Buddah Hall of the Broken Hill Temple

  • I walk into the ancient shrine at dawn,
    The rising sun gilding the green wood tall.
  • A winding path leads to a calm retreat,
    And deep the greenery round the Buddah hall.
  • The birds are galddened by the mountain light,
    Shaded pools bring my heart to peaceful climes.
  • All fretful stirrings of the world now hushed,
    I only hear deep bells and tingling chimes.

目前所見資料,大多採用譯。如 1997 年湖南出版社《漢英對照唐詩三百首》(454頁)、1985年香港商務印書館《唐詩三百首新譯》(260 頁)。

譯視首聯「清晨」爲時間狀語,譯爲 at dawn,增添主語 I。頸聯「人心」轉換爲「我心」(my heart)。尾聯於「餘」、「聞」二字中取「聞」,而誰「聞鐘磬音」呢?一以貫之,添加主語自然就譯成了 I only hear…。

Translation by Ye Yang

Written on the Wall of a Buddhist Lodge behind the Broken Hill Temple

  • In early morning, I entered the ancient temple;
    The rising sun was shining on the tall woods.
  • A path through bamboos led to the quiet place,
    At the Buddhist lodge, lush were flowers and trees.
  • Scenes in the hills cheered up the birds,
    Reflections in the pool cleared up human mind.
  • All around there, the world was so quiet,
    Only the ringing of the bells lingered.

葉揚英譯此詩,是他翻譯駱玉明《簡明中國文學史》時「順手」隨正文而譯。見於 A Concise History of Chinese Literature (P290, Luo Yuming, Brill, 2011)。

譯文似無意追求音韻。首聯亦視「清晨」爲時間狀語(in early morning),添加主語 I。頸聯「人心」取 human mind 而非「我心」(my heart)。尾聯取「餘」而無我「聞」之。

Translation by Sun Da-Yu

On the Rear Dhyana Hall of Po Shan Bonzary

  • When at dawn I repaired to the bonzary old,
    The first beams of the rising sun shone on trees tall.
  • Winding paths led to covert, secluded groves
    Where lush thicket and flowers enclosed th’dhyana hall.
  • The rare aura of the mount pleased the nature of the birds,
    Images in rock pit pools freed one’s mind’s ups and downs.
  • All the hubbubs of man were hushed as by a spell:
    There was nothing left but the bell’s and qing’s clangs.

常建原詩行文用詞還算「平易近人」,譯文用了些許「生僻」大詞,令人生疑。首聯處理同前述兩譯者,我 repair 古寺,用了個十分古舊的詞表達「入」意。頸聯「人心」爲 one’s mind,非「我心」。尾聯亦無「我」,不過「萬籟」居然被當成了 hubbubs of man(熙熙攘攘),常建可能會抗議。

Translation by Witter Bynner

A Buddhist Retreat behind Broken-Mountain Temple

  • In the pure morning, near the old temple,
  • Where early sunlight points the tree-tops,
  • My path has wound, through a sheltered hollow
  • Of boughs and flowers, to a Buddhist retreat.
  • Here birds are alive with mountain-light,
  • And the mind of man touches peace in a pool,
  • And a thousand sounds are quieted
  • By the breathing of a temple-bell.

Witter Bynner 翻譯這首詩,就行文看已完全屬於「以詩譯詩」。他也沒有刻意用「大詞」傳意,所用 points、alive、touches、a thound sounds、breathing 都是「平易近人」的詞彙。因「以詩譯詩」之故,等於依照常建原詩意境,以英文重述。首聯轉換時並無「我」,把「我」對應在原詩頷聯中,仍爲「有我之境」。(此譯文見於香港中文大學出版社2002年出版 Classical Chinese Literatue,841頁,文章鏈接需翻牆)

Translation by Giles A. H.

DHYÂNA

  • The clear dawn creeps into the convent old,
  • The rising sun tips its tall trees with gold,
  • As, darkly, by a winding path I reach
  • Dhyana’s hall, hidden midst fir and beech.
  • Around these hills sweet birds their pleasure take,
  • Man’s heart as free from shadows as this lake;
  • Here worldly sounds are hushed, as by a spell,
  • Save for the booming of the altar bell.

Giles翟理斯)在1898年出版的 Chinese Poetry in English Verse(92 頁)和 1901 年出版的 A History of Chinese Literature (158 頁)兩本書中均引此詩,並翻譯如上。大概他有意追求音韻,尾韻比常建原詩還「整齊」。

看到他的譯文,心中舒一口氣,「吾道不孤」,世界上還是有人不以首聯「清晨」爲時間狀語的——這或許與本詩「有我」、「無我」之境無關。首聯「清晨」他視作主語譯爲 clear(清)dawn(晨)。不過,與Bynner類似,翟理斯仍在頷聯中把詩人翻譯進去了!「曲徑」居次,只是由「我」by a winding path而已,蓋物客我主之觀念「作祟」——這就與「有我」、「無我」之境有關了。

Translation by Fletcher, W. J. B.

The Hall of Silence

  • Where the suns eye first
  • Peers above the pines,
  • On the ancient temple Early daylight shines.
  • To retirement guiding
  • Leads the winding way:
  • Round the Cell of Silence Flowers and Foliage stray.
  • Hark! the birds rejoicing
  • In the mountain light!
  • Like one’s dim reflection
  • On a pool at night
  • Lo! the heart is melted Wav’ring out of sight.
  • All is hushed to silence.
  • Harmony is still.
  • The bell’s low chime alone Whispers round the hill.

FletcherBynner 更進一步「以詩譯詩」,用詞比 Bynner 似乎更加「考究」;處理「有我」、「無我」時,也比 Giles 更進一步。此譯文見於他1919年出版的 Gems of Chinese Verse: Translated Into English Verse 一書216頁。

不過,與前面幾人不同,他理解常建原詩,或是從「無我之境」開始的。首聯處理便同其他譯者不同,「清晨」不是時間狀語,轉換成 early daylight shines。並無「我」之蹤影,全詩乃稍帶擬人化的「以物觀物——『自在之物』」。

Conclusion

前引英譯六種,三華人三洋人。翻譯風格或有差別,首聯「清晨」確存在兩種不同解讀。課上斥諸生白話還原「清晨我走進古寺」爲非,但考察英譯六種之轉換,此種解讀似爲中外「主流」。至寫作此文時,尚未在國人文獻中發現視「清晨」爲「主語」的。

不過,就此詩體制、常建詩風、時代環境臆測,仍堅持此詩爲「無我之境」,僅憑幾首英譯當然不能支撐這個觀點,還有待深入分析常建文獻。

回到文初所言,若把此詩意境攝製視頻短片,不應放一個人進入畫面扮演詩人。此詩鏡頭不是詩人的眼睛,鏡頭是造化本身

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